Rocks I

I’ve been picking up rocks of God recently. Turning them over in my mind, cracking them open to see the colors inside, examining them and setting them back down. I keep walking and picking up rocks, rough, cold, smooth, soft to my fingers. And then I set them back down and continue along. And after I set one down, I know there will always be another one to pick up. I will always have something to listen to, to learn from, to ponder, to toss back and forth between my hands, to fill my pockets. I will never be able to pick up all the rocks of God.

The First Rock:

For Lent I decided to study homosexuality. At home in Malibu, Pepperdine University has been in the process of deciding whether or not to recognize Reach OUT, “a student-run organization that represents and serves the LGBT community at Pepperdine,” as a member of the Inter-Club Council (ICC)*.  The decision to officially recognize Reach OUT would grant, along with the recognition, all of the perks and responsibilities that come with being an official school club. Although Pepperdine has officially responded with “no,” the debate continues. Two weeks ago, I received in my inbox a one-question survey asking whether or not I think Pepperdine should allow Reach OUT to become an official member of the ICC. Only two blanks were available. Yes, or No. I pondered the question for an hour, sent in my response, and resolved to study the perspectives, facts, rumors, Scriptures, and political stances regarding homosexuality. For Lent.

This journey has led me to an unexpected destination, a location that has far less to do with sexual orientation and far more to do with a crucial, and yet often-overlooked, characteristic of the man/God Jesus.

I began the journey by scouring articles and blogs** about homosexuality. When I read these articles and blogs, I do not merely read the posts. I read the public’s commentary beneath the posts. And on most articles (not every one, but most), I have noticed a trend of anger, dissension, polarization, and arrogance that pervades many of the comments. In a word, hate. Hate between “us” and “them,” “Christian” and “Non-Christian,” “liberal” and “conservative” and other such divisive labels. The trend does not limit itself to the topic of homosexuality. Rather, many Web articles and blogs concerning theology, religion, God, salvation, etc. seem to create a highly energized environment of people trying to prove other people wrong.

It was during one of my “study” breaks, however, that I discovered the most interesting thing of all. The band Safety Suit has become one of my favorites, and while I listened to their new album the other day I decided, upon the recommendation of a friend, to watch their music video for the song These Times***. The pervading chorus of the song is simple yet hopeful, repeatedly confirming, “these times are hard, but they will pass.” They will pass. For the video, the band requested the public to post videos sharing why “these times are hard.” And the public responded. Each video depicts a single person holding a poster board with words like, “My mom has cancer” and “We lost our home” and “Anorexia surrounds me.” These videos are sprinkled throughout the entire music video, along with current statistics concerning poverty, unemployment rates, deaths related to cancer, teen suicide, etc.

I cried while watching, both empty and full once again because of pain in the world. And, out of habit, I scrolled down to review the public’s commentary on the video. Immediately I kept reading. Page after page after page, I couldn’t stop.

In the comments, people had posted more stories, more reasons why “these times are hard.”

·      “Lost my Mom to suicide.. It's been a struggle but I know it will pass.. Love you always Mom we miss you..”

·      “i lost my boyfriend in a car accident i do sometimes call his number to hear his voice but ive learned that hes not coming back and the realization kills me every time this song really helps out”

·      “6 years ago my dad died in front of my eyes... just colapsed and died. I'm still waiting for it to pass”

·      “Sometimes, all the crap of the world is overwhelming, but knowing there are other people dealing with the same things is a little comforting--It makes me feel as if even in this vast world of endless hardships, at least we're all connected, you know?”

I kept reading and I realized that these comments were missing something that pervades the comments beneath the blogs about theology and God and religion: hate. It was as if this problem of pain had somehow created a gentleness in each person, an empathy, and a knowledge that everyone, everywhere has struggled, is struggling, and will struggle.

The conclusion of my observations seemed to indicate that religion divides, and, according to these posts, pain unites.

Abandoning my first study of homosexuality (which will resume shortly), I determined to answer the question, “Where is God in all of this?”

It seems that, if I were to imagine a dialogue between Joseph Smith, and Mohammed, and Confucius, and Buddha, and the Pope, and the American, modern-Christian Jesus (who, to me, seems to be a stylized, fictional character who points his finger and spouts judgments on the masses), the dialogue (or rather, debate) would take place in the public commentary beneath the theology blogs. People would refresh their pages in rapt attention, following one blazing, polarizing opinion after another. They would probably be eating popcorn, come to think of it. Sitting and eating popcorn and watching these religious heads try to prove each other wrong.

And off in a corner of YouTube somewhere, would be a Rabbi named Jesus, watching the These Times music video by a band called Safety Suit. He might watch and cry, and read the stories of people who have watched and cried before Him. Then, Jesus might share His own story. He might post a comment, or send in a video of him, holding a poster board that might say:

“I was crucified, though I did nothing wrong.”

Religion divides, pain unites. And if I’ve learned anything in my time in this Jia, in this strange country of China, in this heart, it is this: Jesus is always bigger. He is always bigger than religion and theology and Christianity (yes, even this). But even so, despite His bigness, or perhaps because of His bigness, He chose to come down and sit in the pain right alongside us. He became one of us, to be united with us through the shared experienced of struggle and brokenness.

So may the world, and may the Christians, stop fighting and start sharing. May we set down our popcorn and our ravenous desire to prove someone else wrong, plop beside the person next to us and listen to why these times are hard.

May we be like Jesus.

* “Reach OUT, as a student organization at Pepperdine, affirms that diversity is a critical component to a liberal arts education.  We aspire to contribute to the University community by helping ‘to insure full engagement of diversity-related issues, and to become a clear reflection of the communities we serve.’ (Andrew K. Benton, Envisioning a Bold Future 2001).  Reach OUT exists to support and serve the LGBT students at Pepperdine, and in this capacity it will:

1.      Create a safe space where LGBT students and their peers may comfortably ask questions and confidently express themselves.

2.      Regularly hold social events wherein students may interact with one another, developing healthy, lasting friendships and sharing common experiences.

3.      Perform community service events related to the treatment and well-being of the LGBT community and people as a whole.

4.      Inform the student body of issues pertinent to the LGBT community and to initiate dialogue concerning those issues.

5.      Disarm destructive stereotypes surrounding the LGBT community.

6.      Construct bridges of mutual understanding and respect between members of the LGBT community and their peers.

7.      Facilitate constructive dialogue concerning spirituality, and Christianity in particular, as it relates to issues surrounding sexual orientation and gender identity.” (Reach Out Constitution, Bylaws, Section III)"

** One in particular has been especially beneficial and is devoid of the nastiness and hate I mention later in this post. I encourage anyone to explore it and learn from it. http://www.oddmanout.net/

*** http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOS1GaxqAkI